Don't Call Me Midlife

The 24-Hour Girl Getaway

May 02, 2024 • Alix Mackey & Nicole Stassinopoulos • Episode 30

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In this episode of "Don't Call Me Midlife," Alix and Nicole discuss the concept of the 24-hour getaway. Sharing their recent experiences, they explore the idea of reconnecting with friends over a short but fulfilling trip. From practical tips for traveling light to the importance of prioritizing friendships, Alix and Nicole dive into the benefits of these quick escapes and how they can help navigate the complexities of midlife. Join them as they share laughter, practical advice, and heartfelt moments in this insightful episode.

In this episode, they talk about the following:
1. The concept of the 24-hour getaway.
2. Friendship and prioritizing relationships.
3. Practical tips for traveling.


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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Don't Call Me Midlife podcast. I'm Nicole and I'm Alex. We're your coffee-addicted, wine-loving, amazon-obsessed mom squad. Think of us as your new besties, but with a podcast. And, just like you, we're navigating the Google-defined chaos of midlife while wrangling a pack of boys. But here's the twist we're more than just moms and wives. We're on a mission to reclaim our identities beyond motherhood and we're bringing you along for the wild ride. Now, we don't pretend to have all the answers to life's mysteries, but we're so good at learning and laughing our way through them. So whether you're sipping from your trusty Stanley, indulging in an oat milk latte from Starbucks or raising a glass of Whispering Angel, get ready to hang with us. Together. We'll keep it real, have some laughs and remind you that this crazy journey called life is one adventure worth sharing.

Speaker 1:

Hi, hi, how are you? I'm good, I am, I'm good. I'm excited to talk to you today. Yeah, I'm excited to hear what you have to say. I'm excited to hear about this new 24-hour, 36-hour girl trip concept. I love it. It's like the new midlife concept of busy moms, busy women making time for themselves and their friends to fill their cup. So I can't wait to dive into that.

Speaker 1:

But speaking of cups, what is in your cup today? Actually, I'm trying something new and it is so delicious. I'm not, you know me, I'm just like a little hesitant about different delicious. I'm not, um, you know me, I'm just like a little hesitant about different drinks. So I'm going to show you, like you can't see it on a podcast. It's called Cali water, it's cactus water with wild prickly pear and it says super hydration and rare antioxidants, skin benefits. So, um, it's 25 calories for 12 ounces and four sugars, three added sugars. I can no, I can't do fizzy, but it's um, you know, it's got like blue agave, which I think is the sweetener, and a little monk fruit. So that's usually what gets me is like the aftertaste of certain sugars, like Splenda. Typically, I don't like monk fruit, but I think the agave is like masking it. So it's good, is it? And I'm proud of myself for trying it.

Speaker 1:

Is it caffeinated? No, no, okay, no, it's so refreshing. Okay, that looks good. I'll have to get one of those. I have not seen that. It'd be like the perfect pool drink.

Speaker 1:

I think there's so many fun drinks. I was looking my friend was just telling me Spindrift. I don't know if you drink Spindrift or not, came out with this flavor called Fruit Punch. That is supposed to be like the best flavor ever. Oh yeah, that's. That's carbonated, though, right? Oh yeah, that's all carbonated. Yeah, it is, but that's probably a good option for my kids.

Speaker 1:

My kids love Topo Chico. I'm like, what do you like about it? I love Topo Chico. Well, you don't like, I don't like sparkling. There's also, did you see that White Claw is making a like regular seltzer too, like a non-alcoholic seltzer? I don't know all this stuff. It's like so many different drinks out there. It's very confusing. And what if you have the alcoholic Celsius next to the non-alcoholic? I don't know, maybe just put them in different coolers. If you're having a party, they look the same.

Speaker 1:

Well, because I just came off of this girl's trip, right, I am drinking lots of coffee today. I just have straight up coffee. Um, I'm drinking lots of coffee today. I just have straight up coffee. Um, I'm drinking lots of coffee today. I didn't get into one 30 in the morning. You know, my husband was like, why did you make your flight so late? And I was like I was maximizing the amount of time with my girl. So that is always the question I get you know when I go to book something. He's like you're not going to book the latest flight, are you? It's like I know you're excited to see me, but I want to maximize my time Like I don't know, like let me just travel at the end of the day. Yeah, I mean, I didn't get home till one 30 in the morning, but it's okay, I will. I will muster through today and I will just go to bed early. It was worth it. We'll just suffer today. We'll suffer today, okay. So this is, I think, a really, really good concept. I would seriously make a travel company about this with you. It is the 24-hour getaway, right, is it truly 24 hours or is it more like 36, 48? Well, I did two 24-hour getaways. I just came back from two 24-hour getaways.

Speaker 1:

So I have two best friends from college that live in Chicago and we were trying to get my friend from St Louis to go on a trip and there were so many texts back and forth. She has three kids. We all each have three kids right between the three of us. So she said you know, what's easier for me to do is get away during the week, right, our kids are older. She actually had her kids stay alone one night because they're in high school, they can drive. I can't. I can't do that. I wish Um. And so it happened that she came in. We both came in on Monday morning and she left on Tuesday night. But then I talked to my other friend who lives there and our other friend is confusing Our other friend from Nashville came in.

Speaker 1:

So I had two 24 hour getaways Does that make sense? So one was Monday to Tuesday. The other one, with different people, was Tuesday to Wednesday, but you were in Chicago the whole time. I was in Chicago for 48 hours. Yes, okay, but I think this concept so we had talked about this concept of the 24 hour cause you get your fill right and it's you. Just, you don't put pressure on yourself to have to do all these things. We didn't do a ton of stuff in Chicago, right, I mean, we mostly ate and drank, and, but you, you get to have those really good conversations.

Speaker 1:

But we were talking about this concept, right Of, I was Googling the best hotel, no, wait, the best airport hotels, right, and we all meet at an airport hotel and you're only allowed to bring a carry-on, and you bring a pair of jammies and you go and you, you wear the clothes, you change into your jammies and then you wear the other, the same clothes home, right. So it's just you're literally just pack extra underwear, right, exactly, exactly, and you know you don't have to. I love that, right. And there's sometimes there's really good restaurants, like the Detroit airport has amazing restaurants, yeah, and then you can just go and you don't even have to leave the airport. Well, that's what we wouldn't do, we would not. And I think I love.

Speaker 1:

I love the concept because it's we're all so busy, right, we're dealing with so many different things and our kids and so many needs, but just prioritizing 24 hours with and it fills you up. You talk about kids, you talk about yourself, you talk about we talk about funny things with our husbands, you know. I mean it's like it's just that good, good reconnection where you're just making that time and if 24 hours is all, you've got girls like take it, take the trip, right. And I think it was this hit me when my friend Kelly visited me for my cookbook launch, you know, back in the fall and she's from Chicago, she's one of the ones I saw and she she only came for 24 hours like literally flew in and came to the party next day and this is how this all evolved. Because we were talking about it. We're like that, just like filled my bucket up to see someone, right. And then this is how it all evolved 24-hour girls getaway.

Speaker 1:

I mean it's so smart because you don't have to like plan elaborate things Like sometimes, if you go away for a long weekend, you're like, okay, well, what are we going to do? Let's find some things to do. But honestly, what you just really want to do is be with your friend and just be in the same room with them and look at their face and like hug them and just laugh and there's just nothing. There's just nothing better than that and like getting your cup filled that way. And I think that is literally genius and I think we should trademark this idea Us, even though it's like Kelly's idea Well, it's built out of a lot of different things.

Speaker 1:

And I think we should trademark this idea Us, even though it's like Kelly's idea. Well, it's built out of a lot of different things and I think you're right, it's like taking a lot of times when we take these girls trips. It's like very extravagant. Now you have to have matching this and do this and this activity where really it's just simplifying it of, like you're saying, being with the people.

Speaker 1:

I mean, yesterday what we did was we woke up, we ordered room service like breakfast which is a treat in itself, right. I mean we never do that I would never do it with my kids because it would be a million dollars and and then we went to a museum gift shop, the Museum of Modern Art. So we felt like we're a little cultured. We didn't even go to the museum, nicole, we just went to the gift shop and I bought some cards and so we could tell our husbands we went to a museum. And then we went and had lunch, like that's what we did. But you know, we sat in the room. But that's the majority of girl trips, right, eating, yes, eating and talking. We sat in the room.

Speaker 1:

We talked actually about a trip that we're going to plan with our families and you know, everyone got sort of organized and could just chill. And I think that chill factor is something that we don't do, even on the weekends, like, do you stay in your jammies, like you know, do you ever have that time just to chill? Yeah, no, no, or I'm in my jammies cleaning, but I'm not chilling. There's always something to do, Right, right, right. So, no, I love it. I think I love this concept and all of us love, you know, cocktails and food and sort of all this, all this type of stuff.

Speaker 1:

There is some stuff in Chicago, though, that I do want to go back and do. What I did the first day, though. We did this really fun thing called um ancient baths or Roman baths. Have you ever gone to a place like that? No, but I've heard of them. I mean, they have them in Detroit. I think there's like another, there's another name for them besides bathhouse, because that was like right, like that sounds weird, but it was a bathhouse. It was actually really, really relaxing. It had all these hot tubs type of things and a and a cold plunge, which I'd never done a cold plunge before, and that was very invigorating. Yeah, did you get in the hot tub after? Yes, and I, you know, I didn't think I could do the cold plunge, and my friend was literally like holding my hand, doing it, cause I was like breathing, cause the first time she did it, she like yelled, and you're supposed to be really quiet in there, um, and so that was like I don't, I don't know if I can do it, and I did, and I think you know we was, but then we went and ate and drank, so balance, you know, like a little self-care, and that was, that was our culture.

Speaker 1:

So do you, do you have friends that you think would be like into this type of thing, like just oh, yeah, yes, and like me being in Colorado and then I have two good friends on the East coast, and like me being in Colorado and then I have two good friends on the East Coast. You know, there's like groups that you travel with, right, right. So I think that meeting maybe somewhere in the middle and just having like a quick little like airport airport reunion would be a lot of fun, because to fly from Boston or New York it's almost four hours, I believe, right, right, I mean for someone to come out, yeah, yeah, for you, yeah, yeah. And like my one friend, her daughter's in college and my other friend, she's got one in college, one senior and then a kid old enough so she can actually like leave them, whereas it's harder for me, yeah, um, leave them, whereas it's harder for me, um. So I'm very lucky because they, they come to me a lot, but um, yeah, but I think meeting for 24 hours would be. It's genius. You could meet in Detroit. I did read that the Detroit airport is like you're saying, we're really good. That was one of the places. A lot of places in California have good airports.

Speaker 1:

But even think about, I think about the plane ride that I took yesterday. Like this is going to sound really silly, but even that plane ride was like a vacation in itself. Right, I can't remember. I'm trying to think. The last time I flew by myself, I do feel like it's different, like when you fly by yourself versus your family. It was, it was nice, I sat in the airport, I had a coffee, I read my book and then on the plane I can sleep anywhere. So I like nap on the plane or if I can't, then I'll watch a movie I've been wanting to, but yeah, it's, it's all an experience. I mean. Granted, I don't love traveling. Wait why? I don't know. It's just Wait why I don't know.

Speaker 1:

Like flying, are you scared of flying? No, no, no, I'm not scared of flying. It's just like the length of time it takes and then the delays, and then like sitting next to strangers and airport smells and airplane smells. Airplane smells always get me, especially when they first turn it on and all that air rushes in. You can just smell like other people's hair. That's my head. I think you're very sensitive to smells though, aren't you? I am In general, and I'm sensitive to smells. I mean a lot of. I can deal with a lot of other things, but smells smells get me.

Speaker 1:

So would you prefer to go on a trip and drive then, or take a flight? Like? There are people that would rather just drive, right, I guess it depends on how far I had to drive, okay, like if it's more than five hours, no, thank you. Okay, that's a long time to drive. Yeah, in one day it is, it is, but no, I really don't. Like, I don't mind flying, but it's. I guess it's maybe just more exhausting with the family by myself. I'm good, if you did it by yourself, there'd be no stress. And you know what I did? For the first time in my life, I did a carry-on. Oh my gosh, I saw that in your stories. It was hard for you, right, it was hard, but I learned a lot. So I'm a person that's like.

Speaker 1:

You know, we've talked about jammies before. My friends all joke like I've gone on trips and I've for a week long with my friends for my 40th and I had to send my jammies to the dry cleaning at the hotel, because I don't wear jammies more than once, Like you know. So I did wear my jammies repeat, I only brought one pair of jammies, but I rolled my clothes for the first time and I'd never done that before and that is like a really good thing to do because it is a. It's a, it's a space saver. Do you do that Space saver? Yeah, um, I do. Yeah, I lost my luggage.

Speaker 1:

Um gosh, it was in 2020. I mean, I've done carry ons, but in 2021 they lost our luggage and it was. It was after we lost some sentimental things. We went for a funeral when my mother-in-law passed and there was some sentimental things in there that we lost. You never got it back. We never got it back. Oh, wow, I think. Yeah, I don't know what happened. I think actually, somebody may have took it, but, um, so anyway, uh, ever since then I've been like, if I can do a carry-on, I'm gonna do a carry-on.

Speaker 1:

But I notice myself like I, I overpack all the time, yes, and I just tell myself you know what, like, if I really need something, I can buy it. Yes, that's what I said to myself. But I always wear the same pants, like, and if I need them washed, there's usually like some place to wash them within the hotel, the dry cleaning. So usually I'll just pack one pair of pants, um, and then some tops. But usually what gets me is, yeah, I don't. Well, no, I don't do packing cubes.

Speaker 1:

I did learn from somebody online that, like she puts like half of the outfit in the suitcase and half of it out, and then she like folds them in in a certain way, what do you mean? Like the sweaters, like out of the suitcase, half of it is out, yeah, like the neck is inside, and then like a pair of pants is like to the left and then like a dress is to the right and like she just like tucks them in and the way it like lays flat, it just, it just works. Oh, like how to keep your clothes not wrinkled, maybe like that, yes, well, yeah, but like, but the way, but the way it lays, it's um, it doesn't get bulky. I don't know how to explain it. I'm gonna have to try to find her. Maybe we need to research this, because I was sort of also thinking how, how does it? It's the same clothes, but how does rolling it save space, like I think. I think this is.

Speaker 1:

I was most concerned, actually, nicole, about my toiletries. So, yeah, toiletries are what gets me. I mean, I get the mini months right. So you have to be prepared right. You have to have a plan going into this If you're going to do a carry on. Now. If I went for more than a few days, I'm not really sure I could do a carry on, but now I feel confident that for a weekend or my 24 hour getaways, I can do a carry on. And I was telling everyone at the airport and the security people were like don't care. I was like, oh, you wanted to spread the word to everyone. Oh, it was like five, 30. And I was like six, 30 in the morning and I was like I did a carry on and they're like, wow, that's great, thank you. They're like nobody cares, lady.

Speaker 1:

I think I you know it was, it was worth it, and I think I brought just the amount of clothes that I was going to wear and I think it makes me learn that you can re-wear stuff and you can do it, and I think, getting those little toiletries, it's like a capsule. You need a capsule wardrobe like a mini capsule. Oh, my gosh, nicole, you should do that. A travel capsule wardrobe, yeah, I did. Well, I did one in the fall for like a little getaway and that was actually really popular.

Speaker 1:

But I know that like these ladies, that like go to Europe and you can only have like these little suitcases, like they pack for six weeks, um, with just like a carry on. Oh, I think these like a carry on and then you know you can bring your bag and a purse or something. So they, they make it work. But I'm just like how, how, like you got to rewear a lot of things? You do. You know what? I total mindset shift.

Speaker 1:

We have an idea we have this 24 hour girls get away. You're going to do like a travel capsule and I'll put together a snack guide there you go, and a girl's gift guide, because I, even though I had to carry on, I did bring gifts for each of my girls. Oh, that's sweet, that's sweet. I don't bring gifts, you don't. We don't bring gifts. No, we don't do that. No, unless it's like somebody's birthday, you know, and it's like a thank you gift. That's so funny. We have this like unspoken thing. Sometimes it's present. Yeah, we have this unspoken thing that everyone always brings a gift.

Speaker 1:

One of my friends is a really good needle pointer and she's making us us with our college I went to Vanderbilt. She's making us like a little. It says like Vandy on it like a little shirt and a, and going to put it into a frame for us. So that was really sweet. Oh my God, that's so cute. I love homemade gifts. Yes, she's so talented. She's talking to us all about needlepoint, which is something that I just. It is another whole nother world that I just don't.

Speaker 1:

I do think I need a hobby. That's nice that you can like sit and do quietly, because I don't have one of those read. Start with that. I know, yeah, I'm a book collector. Read all those books that are on your. But that's what's so fun about going on these trips, too, with people is you learn like well, first of all, I like buy a million things on Amazon, because all of us are like talking about our favorite things, right, but you get all these ideas of you know, and we've we've talked about this in past episodes of what, what brings joy Right To your friends, because my friend is like into this needlepoint thing and and she's like so cute about it. That's not something, you know, that I would ever think about doing.

Speaker 1:

So when you're having conversations with your friends on the phone or your FaceTiming or whatever that are long distance, you know you only get so much of the story, but when you actually see them you can really know what is really going on in their lives. And I think to maintain friendships you have to have a friendship. You know what I mean. Like you have to see people, even if you've known them for 30 years. Like it's really important to be able to foster those friendships and make it a priority. Um, one of my best friends since I was five well, she is my best friend since I was five. Jessie lives in New York and I know she tries to plan a lot of girls trips and she always was telling me what's the secret of your girls trips? How do you, are you able to take so many girls trips? And I said, well, you know one. It was written in my wedding vows. I mean, that's a joke. You have a. I mean you have a very supportive husband. I know that there are a lot of husbands that are not.

Speaker 1:

I don't think it's a control thing, but it's just. You know, it's many factors, right? Well, you know, I did have a situation where my middle son I typically drive him to the bus stop to be with his friends. I mean, don't even ask, right, this is so ridiculous. And my husband had to leave for work before he went to school and I was like tell him to walk to the end of the street. He was nervous, nicole, I was nervous that he wasn't going to make the bus, so we had to get him an Uber. How far away is the bus stop? No, an Uber to school, nicole. Oh, wait, why my friends really miss the bus? No, because normally he takes. We have a bus that comes to the end of our street, but he doesn't take that bus. I drive him to a different street to take a bus with his friends, right? Oh? But so Alex didn't think that he would do it, so he'd take an Uber. So so, yes, there's lots of there's lots of coordination when you leave, but I think it's a little less for 24 hours.

Speaker 1:

I did have a big good, you know, mom tribe helped me with a half day. But I think you know, back to what I was talking to, jesse was also, you have to make these girls trips a priority. You have to make these, you know I'm not saying you need to go all the time, I mean, but you definitely have to have a group of people that are like we are doing this and you know what someone's going to miss, something. I mean, if when we picked this date it was a perfect date for all of us, but then someone's husband was traveling, I had a half day, we had this, you know, I mean it. Just things come up and you just it's never going to be a perfect date and I think it's just making that a priority.

Speaker 1:

It's like what is so important, because I feel like exhausted, right, but yeah, I feel so fulfilled, like you were saying, when you see your friends and just it is. It is worth the tiredness, is worth the hassle. It is 1000% Like so, yeah, I'll get a little choked up. Yeah, percent Like so, yeah, I'll get a little choked up, but yeah, well, that's beautiful. I think every, every woman should, should be able to have that Like that, like it's just a, an emotion you can't explain. It's like just a, a love, that, um, that if you can't have like on the regular because they don't live near you, then you got, you got to go get it and and hold onto it and and nurture it.

Speaker 1:

You know Totally, and I think you know, in terms of midlife, I just I don't, I don't think we we underestimate how much we're all going through. Right, like a lot of my friends are thinking about colleges, like big life decisions, and the college process just sounds sort of very scary to me and I'm glad we're not there yet. But, um, you know, working with their kid, there's so much focus when you've got kids in high school about what they're going to do next and how they're doing and a lot of this mental wellbeing, and our kids are all going through a lot of different things. You know, after COVID we're going through a lot of things that I just think we also need to sit back and not underestimate all the things that we're going through. And I didn't know. I guess my point is I didn't know I needed to see them as much as I did. You know, yeah, yeah, so yeah.

Speaker 1:

Well, when's the next girl trip? Have you guys planned one? We're getting together this summer, and then I've got my college reunion. Is it my 30-year college reunion? No, 25. 25 years ago, I don't even 99? Yeah, 25-year reunion for college, which is going to be fun and we're always excited about that, so that'll be fun. Yeah, I love it. What? When's the next 24 hour trip? Do you have anything like that planned? You need to come to Boston. You need to come here. I know I need a 24. I need a 24 hour. I need like several 24 hour trips. Yeah, so we would need like um, I know, I know, I know, I know I got to, I know, I know I got to get it. I got to go. I have to go visit my brother. So, yeah, first and foremost, I have to visit my brother, meet my nieces. They're going to be like in college soon. That's so fun.

Speaker 1:

So, nicole, what time is it? It's my favorite time. It is unsolicited advice time. So what's your unsolicited advice today? So my unsolicited advice is to get out your calendar, whether it's paper or electronic, and pick some dates. Okay, just pick some dates, talk to your spouse and then, and then reach out to your friends. Like to start the. You have just be the initiator, be the, be the person that starts it and whether it doesn't happen, like it could happen next month or it could happen six months from now. But just open your calendar and be like when can I do 24 hours? Yeah, I love that, because we even said you know what, let's just put a day in the calendar for September already, like six months from now, right, let's just put it on there so that we have it. So just start, just start it, start the thread going, it'll, it'll get you guys talking about you know lots of other stuff.

Speaker 1:

I think my advice would be because when I, when I sort of choked up, I was like I didn't know how much I needed to see them, even though I talked to them and you know sort of reflect on who will fill you up, right. You also don't get a ton of opportunities to do things like this, right? So you really want to think about those people that will fill you up. Um, where you can not make it, I guess also not make it too big, because if you get these groups too big, you really won't have that quality time. I mean, each of these trips was it was three of us, right? So we shared a hotel and we were sleeping in the bed. You know we were. It was a really small group and it's okay. You also don't need your group of 10 people to go on a trip, right? It's. It's. It's thinking about not that they don't fill you up, but it doesn't always work Right and it's just really thinking about, um, what's going to fill you up and just go do it. Like, just go do it and have fun.

Speaker 1:

I I personally, love sharing a room with my best friend, because the giggles that come at night, like when you're laying there trying to sleep and like a thought comes like just, it's just, there's just something fun and like high school-ish about it, like, and I like a silly, like you know, or you can put your music on and dance and it's just fun, it's fun. I know Alex is always. Alex is always thinking you guys like share a bed together. And I'm like, honestly, that is not even a second thought, like those girls I know since I was 18, like it's just so funny. So, yeah, share a room, it's also cheaper. And yeah, just go on that trip, start texting your friends. So, 24 hour getaway, it's going to be the new thing for midlife. Can't wait.

Speaker 1:

And that's a wrap for today's episode of Don't Call Me Midlife. We hope you had as much fun as we did. Absolutely, your support means the world to us. If you're just waiting in the carpool line, don't forget to follow the show, and if you're feeling extra spicy today, leave us a rating and review Before we part ways. We've got a special invitation for you. Join our newsletter to stay in the loop with all things midlife, magic, bonus content and more. Head on over to the show notes for how to sign up. We can't wait to keep the conversation going. And, of course, remember, in the whirlwind of life and motherhood, don't forget to fill up your own cup first. You're extraordinary and your journey is worth every moment. Until next time, cheers.