Don't Call Me Midlife

Things That Drive Us Crazy!

April 25, 2024 • Alix Mackey & Nicole Stassinopoulos • Episode 29

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In this episode of "Don't Call Me Midlife," Alix and Nicole dive into their midlife pet peeves and annoyances. From excessive appointment reminders to the challenges of driving at night, they explore a range of relatable frustrations. With humor and candor, they share anecdotes and exchange tips on navigating the quirks of midlife living. Join them for a candid conversation where no annoyance is off-limits.

In this episode, they talk about the following:
1. Midlife pet peeves and annoyances. 
2. Coping mechanisms and strategies. 
3. The importance of being aware of others' pet peeves.


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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Don't Call Me Midlife podcast. I'm Nicole and I'm Alex. We're your coffee-addicted, wine-loving, amazon-obsessed mom squad. Think of us as your new besties, but with a podcast. And, just like you, we're navigating the Google-defined chaos of midlife while wrangling a pack of boys. But here's the twist we're more than just moms and wives. We're on a mission to reclaim our identities beyond motherhood, and we're bringing you along for the wild ride.

Speaker 1:

Now, we don't pretend to have all the answers to life's mysteries, but we're so good at learning and laughing our way through them. So, whether you're sipping from your trusty Stanley, indulging in an oat milk latte from Starbucks or raising a glass of Whispering Angel, get ready to hang with us. Together. We'll keep it real, have some laughs and remind you that this crazy journey called life is one adventure worth sharing. Let's get this started. I am so excited for today. It's like we can just. We can just vent. We can just. We can just. We can be us right. We can be these midlife moms, and the topic today that we are talking about is we don't really know what we're Crotchety old ladies, crotchety old ladies, Midlife pet peeves, an annoy-a-thon? You know? Whatever you want to call it, this is your place. Ladies, if you are listening today, where, just if you're listening, your card is out loud. Say what annoys you. Say what is your pet peeve, right, email us and tell us what your pet is. Go into our Instagram DMs and let us know, because we would love to know. And you know, I just saw a comedy show this past week that sort of prompted this topic and I told Nicole about it. I was literally just on the ground laughing and they're just, you know, talking about fun, really realistic things that sort of annoy us and sometimes we don't have a place to say it, right, because we don't want to seem like we're a certain way or we're feeling a certain way. But today, guess what? We're not judging. We are, we are and we're not judging. This is the space to tell us. We're going to talk about everything that annoys us and, um, I can't wait. Not just like you're a loud chewer, you know, I mean, well, that's annoying, that is like that is annoying. But we're going to dive a little deeper. Some of them may just be regular pet peeves and some of them may be midlife pet peeves. But someone did make a point that things just bother her more now that she's in midlife. That didn't bother her as much, and so I've got a whole list.

Speaker 1:

Okay, wait, what's in your cup? We almost forgot. We were so excited. I, what's in your cup? We almost forgot. Oh, we were so excited, I got excitement in my cup. Now I have a um, what are they called? Like a golden milk latte, turmeric latte, so it's just like a little powder with some coconut milk.

Speaker 1:

I love all your fancy drinks. I'm trying to like change it up. Oh, my gosh, I have. I actually have an energy drink because I have a big day today, so I've got a sugar-free ZOA, which I love. Is it ZOA, z-o-a? This is a zero sugar energy drink. This is strawberry watermelon. I love it, it is good, and I think I'm trying to stop a habit of coffee in the afternoon, so this is like my gateway.

Speaker 1:

A habit of coffee in the afternoon, so this is like my gateway, well, your gateway. So how much coffee did you have this morning? Two cups, two cups, but. But I think that low acid coffee, nicole, does not have as much caffeine as regular. Is that true? I don't know. I mean it feels like it, cause I definitely don't ever feel jittery. I never have a stomach ache. Yes, check, check. Those are like, and I don't crash. You know I probably won't drink this whole. I'll drink one of these, like half of it, right, I'm not going to have the whole thing. I have a lot of natural energy because I worked out today eat healthy, so I'm good. This is just a little, a little push, okay.

Speaker 1:

So back to the annoy-a-thon. So this also was started because I was talking to Nicole about something that really annoys me and I hope, I hope some of these are all these things resonate with you, and I was telling my husband about it as well. So you know, when you have an appointment right, it could be an appointment for your kids, an appointment for you. It's like I'll give you the example of it here she goes ladies dentist appointment, right. And I have to start this out by saying I don't get annoyed by a lot of things, right, and I do. You get annoyed easily. I do Okay, I do Okay. I mean I mean probably more than the average person. You would never know, right, I have a pretty high threshold for that, until it gets to be like enough is enough.

Speaker 1:

So, having this dentist appointment, you make the appointment right, they send you a text right after you make the appointment. They send you a text a month before they send you email confirmations. Then you have to confirm back that you're going to attend it, even though you've already made the appointment. I mean, it's like I have to confirm over text and email and this is not just the only dentist appointment that's done this, like all the appointments lately. It's like what, what do you think I'm not going to show up? I mean, I may be late, but you know I will be there. And I was telling Alex and he's like I was getting so riled up and he's like I think you're taking this as a personal affront that you think that they think that you won't show up. I'm like I sort of am.

Speaker 1:

But why do we need all this extra communication about all these? And if you have multiple kids, you're getting like all this junk stuff, like whether I show up or not, like that's my consequence, it does not matter, I do not need 10 reminders. You'll get your $50 office visit. You have my card on file, right, but I will be there. But I do feel like dentists are the worst out of all. Okay, maybe that's what it is, more than doctors, more than a physical therapist or mental health therapist. I don't get as many as I do with a dentist. Okay, so maybe that's what it is. We've been going to the dentist lately a lot, so that was how this whole thing started.

Speaker 1:

And then you know what Nicole and I were like. This is such a good idea for an episode, so we texted our friends what are your midlife pet peeves? And I swear to God, I opened the floodgates for this one text chain. I think I got a hundred texts about this. For those of you watching on YouTube, why don't you pull up that piece of paper? Okay, so this is my piece of paper. These are my girls. They know who they are. They are my Weston tribe and they are a bunch of ladies that are high achievers. They have big jobs, they're CMOs, they're lawyers, but they are also really funny. Right, I don't consider myself a funny person, but some of the memes they send, some of their comments, are like they're like Unicle, like this, like dry sense of humor, and it's like I just sit there and just watch and laugh because I don't even know if I can participate.

Speaker 1:

So I have probably about 25 things that I'm going to read from and then we can talk about it. And I know you got some pet peeves too, right, I did. I do have some down on my paper right here, um, but most of them are just in my my text message, uh, thread. So some of them were funny, um, some of them were. There was a lot of crossover, but yeah, I can't wait to dive into these. Let's just dive in. I want to.

Speaker 1:

I want to start with one because one of my friends said Alex is not going to like this one. And guess what it is? Oh, making dinner every night. I was like, okay, well then you need to come over my house. That I'm like that is so funny. That is definitely not one of my pet peeves, it's one of my joys and which is why I do what I do. So that was. I liked the preface of her knowing me so well that she knew that that was not going to be one of mine.

Speaker 1:

So, making dinner I'm sure a lot of ladies out there, yes, that is annoying. We do have to feed our kids, we have to feed ourselves, just in general. You know, eat every day. I just don't like. I don't like like on the weekends, like coming up with the breakfast, lunch and dinner. Like I enjoy cooking, I don't mind coming up with dinner. It does feel a little daunting. It's not a pet peeve, but like when we were home for COVID and I had to be like the person that came. It's like go get a bowl of cereal. Like we're not doing fancy every meal. That is so funny yourself, I, I really like you're like, I dug into that, I thrived, I dug into that. I was like I was not doing the sourdough starter, but I was like doing a copycat Starbucks lemon loaf, like you know, I mean so I do, but I can see how it can get that. That can definitely be an annoyance. I mean our kids. The good thing about midlife is guess what. You can go get a cereal, you can make yourself a sandwich, you can. You know. So that that is a positive. Okay, listen to this one. I thought this was hilarious, nicole.

Speaker 1:

50 is the new 30. Like, no, it's not the new 30. It's 50. It's not, and we're aging, you know. Like 50 is not the new 20. 50 is not the new anything. 50 is 50. Just like 30 is 30. Yeah, 20 is 20, 40 is 40. Why do people feel the need to have to say 50 is the new 30? Because people are taking better care of themselves and they look younger than what our generation, like the 50-year-olds, looked back.

Speaker 1:

Then I mean, yeah, I mean there's also the introduction to Botox, which this is what brings me to what one of my friends said is gatekeeping. Gatekeeping on anything like beauty and health related. Like, if you get Botox, just say I get, I get Botox. There's no way that you're 55 and you don't have one wrinkle. Like it's just like own it. Way that you're 55 and you don't have one wrinkle. Like it's just like, own it, just own it, yeah. Or like, um, if you dye your hair, you know don't, who do people do that? Don't, I don't? Well, this is what one person said like like gatekeeping, like clothes, like, oh, this is so old I don't remember. Like she's like, yeah, right, you, you freaking remember where you got that shirt. You just don't want to tell me so.

Speaker 1:

And then another one was um, like kind of like diet culture, like people that lose 30 pounds instantly and they're just like, oh, I just cut out you know diet Coke and eating after seven o'clock at night. Like, no, you didn't. Like you either are taking Ozempic Optivia or you've really cut your calorie, like you have done something drastic. This wasn't like a long-term and if you did it, own it. But like, don't lie. It's like let's share. Let's share with what we're doing and be honest with ourselves. Like maybe someone has a really good idea that may work for someone else, but don't act like you did nothing and you lost 30 pounds, because guess what? We know that doesn't really happen unless you're doing you know what. So that's not okay. That is just not okay.

Speaker 1:

And also, too, yeah, also too maybe somebody wants to get Botox, but they don't know where to go and they want, like word of mouth or like a trust factor, like going into. Like when we interviewed Allie from Renova Med Spa, she said that it can be very intimidating walking into one of these places. So it's like share, yeah, share, share in the wealth, share in the wealth, share in the wealth. Don't gatekeep, do not, do not, don't, don't gatekeep.

Speaker 1:

Um, speaking of something like that, one of my friends had said people making money off some of these like off menopause, basically, like making these menopause teas and making all these things that are supposed to like help menopause, but guess what? It really doesn't. It's just like such a marketing gimmick that we all get sucked in, but it's like, don't do that. It's like skincare, yeah yeah, like it's not really going to work. Maybe it'll work in our mind, but like no, no, no, let's not. Let's stop doing that. Let's stop doing that Right, let's be educated, let's educate ourselves and see what really works. Totally, totally Okay.

Speaker 1:

This is one of my things too, that is, it's a pet peeve. It's nothing that anyone else does, it's just something that we have to do. Is driving at night, like that was really? Oh, my God, I hate it. I hate it Like why I mean I guess I could use as a pet peeve, and that my kids can't drive yet and I have to pick them up because they want to be picked up at like 11 o'clock at night from friends' houses. That would be the pet peeve.

Speaker 1:

But I really just don't like driving at night because my eyes are getting worse and I just I don't like it at all. It's not okay. Yeah, it's, uh, it's not good, especially if you have astigmatism that's what I have Because of the glaring lights. Yeah, yeah, it's, it's hard and my, my husband will be like what's the matter with you? I'm like, because I'm like squinting and like leaning forward. I don't like driving in new places. Okay, if it's, if it's a familiar place, you know. Then, like I know the road's going to shift this way, but I just don't. I don't like driving in newer places, but no, I like who wants to leave their house at night? No, I don't, I definitely don't.

Speaker 1:

I told my, I told my eye doctor about this, cause I wear contacts, I have astigmatism, you know, I've got to wear reading glasses, all the things. And she's like, well, that's just aging. And I was like I'm 46 years old and she's like, well, you could wear these glasses while you're driving at night that look like they're like yellow tinted glasses. I bought them and I was like these don't work, I can't like the glare and all of that. It did not help at all.

Speaker 1:

That is a pet peeve of mine. What You're just aging, you're just it's just a part of aging. Yeah, yeah, yeah, like well, saying that I don't want that to be. Yeah, I don't want that to be the like standard. Like this is just aging. Okay, accept it. Okay, well, no, it sucks. Yeah, you know right. Or come up with a different right, or come up with a different phrase, come up with a different face. Okay, speaking of aging, okay, this is a good idea. What? This isn't a pet peeve, this is just an idea that someone had.

Speaker 1:

What, if, like, we still want to have fun, right, and if you want to go out, we like to be home early, right, what about starting a dance club that opens at like five o'clock and closes at like nine? She wants to go to a dance club that you can still have fun, but we can still be in bed before midnight. Wait, this was one of your friends that suggested it. Yes, it's sort of like the margarita truck, like on vacation. Yes, it's sort of like the margarita truck, like on vacation. Yes, sort of like we have to start earlier, end earlier. Like the margarita truck. That's sort of like the ice cream truck that could come to your house, right, and bring you margaritas. Have you seen that idea? I remember hearing about it in COVID, but I don't know if they actually still do it.

Speaker 1:

Maybe the pet peeve is that dance clubs don't open up till 10, but if you're not going to a dance club, maybe that's not a real pet peeve. Right, right, maybe on vacation. Yes, yes, maybe on vacation Like resorts. Yeah, a geriatric resort, exactly the 50 over place, and they've got an orthopedic surgeon on site for those that may break a hip. Okay, that's not us. It's just part of aging, alex, it's just a part of aging. It's just part of aging Uh, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Okay, I want some ideas. You're the fashion expert, so I want some opinions of these things. Okay, these are things that are pet peeves, right? Um, how come? Well, crop tops is obvious, right, we're good with crop tops. Um, what about dresses with sleeves? Like, there's so many sleeveless dresses. There needs to be more cute dresses with sleeves that don't look old lady-ish, right? If you want to hide your arms a little bit, yeah, yeah, they're. Uh, they're few and far between, for sure, right? Um, that are cute, that are cute. Yeah, you have to look at an anthro. Anthropology is going to be your answer, okay, okay, so good, we're giving some advice too.

Speaker 1:

What about making a comfortable strapless bra or just bras in general? How about bras in general? I think strapless bras are like just evil. Like, I think if you have the most perky breasts, I think a strapless bra would like even bring it down, like if they were even silicone, like there's nothing, right they're? Just, how do you do that? Every single one I buy, you know and I am small chested that it's even uncomfortable. I just rather not wear a bra, but I know most people have to wear a bra. So strapless bras, that is a pet peeve. Someone needs to invent one.

Speaker 1:

I know some of my friends that love Kim Kardashian's new company what is it called? Skims? Yeah, they love her bras. Who are, who are bigger chested, like those are supposed to be really really comfortable. So go Kim Kardashian. Her pajamas are really comfortable, but I haven't. I haven't tried her bra, not that I'm big chested, but Her underwear is really comfortable, actually, cause I wear hanky panky. But I did buy some of her underwear and it's very comfortable.

Speaker 1:

I have to say, oh my God, I I hate hanky panky. Why, I don't know, I don't like the material. Oh, that's all I wear and I find that, like the wait, you were the G, the, not the G string the thong, the thong, yeah, hanky panky, yeah, yeah, I don't find it. I don't find the material comfortable back there. Oh, really, I like. So, soma, wait, but it's just softer.

Speaker 1:

So do you wear like granny panties? I want to get a rash in my ass, do you? Do you wear granny panties or do you wearing? No, I wear, I wear. I wear thongs. Yeah, oh, okay, do you.

Speaker 1:

Here's a question do you wear the same underwear to work out as you do, like daily life? Yes, oh, I don't. I don't. That's one of my like my own personal pet peeves. I have the Lululemon thongs that I wear for working out and then hanky pankies, so I have two sets. What? What is so special about the Lululemon? I think they're very comfortable. They're very, very comfortable. They, they make a lot, they make a whole. Do you know they make underwear? I didn't. Oh, yes, it is very comfortable.

Speaker 1:

Teach us, we're learning, we're getting advice with our annoy-a-thon too. I love that. Do they make underwear for those ladies that don't want to wear a G-string? Yes, well, is a g-string the same thing as a thong? Those are different things. I'm sorry, I keep saying g-string. I'm like, do you own, just like, that little thin, like I do not own a g-string? Like what are you talking about? It's thinner. Yes, yes, it's literally a string. Yeah, okay, yeah, I think I probably had those when I was younger, but not now. Okay, it's not speaking of G-strings.

Speaker 1:

This is totally changing topics, but this is something, and it's more of an advice thing that is given to us midlife moms. It is you should respond calmly to your children. You need to engage them in the behavior and all of this and it's like it, I think, model the behavior model that you know, but I think it's. It's like sometimes you know what, aren't we allowed to yell, aren't we allowed to get upset. I mean, I do apologize to my kids after, but and I and I blame it on my hormones I say mommy has a lot of going on in her body. But it's like maybe you just want to go into a closet and scream Like it is okay to have feelings right or no, a hundred percent, and I think it's, it's normal, but like okay.

Speaker 1:

So last night I made dinner and it took a little while because I made, I made a lot, and afterwards everyone's scattered, okay, and um, you know, my husband works like he's still working. He's like almost on like a two week stretch. Yeah, so I get it. He's usually much more helpful.

Speaker 1:

But I was like you, you know, hormonally, yesterday and I was just like, um, I'm like, are you guys serious? My 14 year old was laying on the couch. Yeah, my husband was sitting on the chair. They're both on their phones. Yep, I'm like, are you guys serious right now? Yeah, I'm like you just expect me to like clean up dinner after I was just here for two hours and I like slammed a dish down. Good, I like that. I think that's good, nicole, that's okay. Like, I'm like, how do you not notice? And how is it okay for you to just sit there and, um, just looked at me. I think he was just a little shocked. And then my 14 year old comes up and he's like he puts his arms, he puts his hands on my shoulders and he's like mom, just take a deep breath. He's like, I'm sorry, that's so cute, I'll help you. Yeah, he's like, but take a deep breath. I'm like. So you know it's also teaching him to help other people. So sometimes you know, if we're talking so calmly all the time to them, sometimes I feel like you have to get a little mad to like prove your point Right, especially with our boys, right? Like it's not. Like. Hey, honey, can you come set the table? Like you know, I mean, that works to a certain extent. I think we as women always know what's going to go on. Which you made me, you made me remind me. You reminded me of another annoyance Now I'm getting in thinking of my whole family is when there's stuff on the stairs, right, and people walk by it.

Speaker 1:

I mean, could it be more obvious? I had to have like a family, literally, nicole, family meeting. Be like listen, if it's on the stairs, it means it needs to go to the top of the stairs, so just drop it up. Yeah, I do that with the garbage. Yes, so you guys haven't obviously you listeners have not been to my home. Yeah, yeah, so we have the main level and then you take the stairs down and it'll take you to the garage. But I have a railing and I can hang garbage bags from it, and so I'll put the garbage there. And their kids are coming up and down the stairs all day long and literally like they have set chores and it's like one person takes the garbage out one day and then the next. You know, they know their rotation and I'm just like texting them. I'm like, are you serious? Who, how did you not notice this? This has been sitting here Like, yeah, that is a pet peeve of mine. Yes, and the stair thing, I'll leave all their stuff there. Okay, that's what. I'm just going to walk by it, yeah, but then that's going to be a pet peeve for me that their stuff is right there, yeah, and I don't want to look at it. But you know, I have to be stubborn and like not do it. Yes, yes, okay, nicole.

Speaker 1:

Speaking of phones, here's another pet peeve that I just thought of. What about Tik TOK and Snapchat? Like, it's on the list, like, what about? Just, we can't say social media, cause we do social media. I would say don't take Instagram on there. But I'm saying I recently my my son, one of my sons not going to say who it is didn't have his phone for five days and I think I told you about this. Literally, he was like a different person. Right, he was engaging because the phone and that's who he is. Right. But the phone, when they're so occupied by TikTok and Snapchat, it's like they always have to be doing something where, if they don't have that, I actually had a conversation with them. And what kind of CRAP are they watching anyways on YouTube or TikTok? Yeah, too much.

Speaker 1:

What about the random ceiling shots on Snapchat? Oh God, I don't even know what is that. I know it's to keep some streak going, whatever that means, right, but maybe some midlife parent out there knows what we're talking about. But that was a friend. She's like Snapchat, tiktok, the word, riz, crocs, the slang, the slang, the slang, the slang that everyone has. And God forbid, we try to say the slang. Yeah, no, no. Yeah, it's okay for my son to listen to Rock the Bells on Sirius XM, to my old school jams yeah, and that's okay. But I can't get into his, you know, like pop culture stuff. Well, what about this, nicole?

Speaker 1:

And this is particular, I know for you and I is lately, this is a real pet peeve of mine how Amazon is sending things in different boxes. Like literally, I bought something that was twice the size, yes, and, and they're sending one thing. Like I always check that little box, like put multiple things in a box for less deliveries, but this was like the box the size of myself. I don't even remember what was in it and it's like the tiniest thing. I feel like it's just such a waste and we recycle our boxes, but why do we need to send 10 different packages? Just put, just wait, just put everything. Nothing is an emergency on on Amazon. I mean, come on, yes, I don't know, that's weird, especially if you like, hit check the box like for right, probably because there's so many warehouses everywhere just coming from everywhere. Yeah, um, okay, this is a funny one.

Speaker 1:

And I feel this when you go out to dinner and this is even for midlife moms when you order a glass of wine on a menu, right, and they have an option. I know you're looking at me like what's she going to say? There's an option of like a three or a four ounce pour. And you're like do I want a shot of wine? No, I want a glass. You know, when you go and they're like would you like three, six or nine? Right, I'm not saying you always have to get the nine. I mean we do Three, six, nine, three, six, nine, but why are you, why are you doing three or four ounces of wine?

Speaker 1:

I think it was paparazzi where I was there and I was like why, like who drinks this? Three ounces of wine? Like that's crazy. You're like give me, give me how many. How many ounces are in a bottle? How many? Right, exactly, alex and I have a lot of debates about how many glasses of wine are in a bottle of wine or a bottle of champagne. We differ on that. So I say four. What do you say? I say it depends on the poor. Well, I say well, obviously. I say four. He says six. I'm like yeah, I don't think so, because Alex gets the three ounce. He's getting the three ounces of wine. He doesn't even drink wine. Oh my gosh. Okay, that's so funny. Give me, give me one last one. That is, that's one of your favorites. Oh, there were so many. Um, well, this was a hot topic so I want to touch on it. Okay, okay, birthday gifts Okay, there's like there's two parts to this.

Speaker 1:

Birthday gifts in midlife, like when everybody just gives a gift card, yeah, like in a friend group, it's just like one big gift card to your friend, like that was a pet peeve of one of my friends. She's like why do that? I can you know, it just seemed silly. If we have a girl's day, you're saying, and you've got a group of like five ladies and everyone contributes to like a spa gift card, yeah, or like uh, she said Visa gift card but like, oh for like a certain dollar mark to a store, and it's just like that's the gift that everybody always gets. She's like just keep your money, I don't need anything. She's like it doesn't feel genuine. It doesn't feel genuine.

Speaker 1:

Okay, I was just having this, but there's a follow-up thing to it, so I can't we can't skip that part, okay. Okay, I'll tell you real quick, cause you know this. This could, like gift giving is my love language, so we don't need to hurt, we don't need to hurt my heart too quick. Um, I just had this recent discussion with friends about this. We have this group of six friends and we do the birthday dinner right, we do the gift. And I recently said to them you know, let's do things that people want right. Like let's ask that person One of my friends you know really wanted these sneakers one year, so we all pulled our money together and got the sneakers right.

Speaker 1:

Like, we're over a Visa gift card, like that. I agree, I agree that is a pet peeve. I would rather have nothing than a Visa gift card. I'm putting my, I'm putting my stake down. Do not give me a Visa gift card. But I also am a lover of gifts, so I really like to spend the time thinking about what people would like. So I think we do that. We ask, you know, yeah, there's always like one person. That's like the designated person to ask because they're the closest. Yeah, you know, and like one year, one of my friends wanted Botox, you know, and so, and Botox is super expensive. She's like if I could just have money towards it. She's like that would be great. So I love that idea that super expensive. She's like if I could just have money towards it. She's like that would be great. So I love that idea. That's such a good idea.

Speaker 1:

You know, I keep in my Google keep. I keep a little list of things that I want because I see them and I forget, like things that I wouldn't buy on my own, um, so I usually send them to my mom or Alex. But, yeah, okay, send them to your friend group. Now I will. Oh, here's my, here's my Google keep. Um, so what is? What is the part two? I'm so curious. Oh, the part two is the reasonable amount of time from like said birthday. Let's say, like my birthday is May 17th, like, um, and then I don't get a birthday gift for like two months. From this one person it's like oh, I forgot your gift, oh, I have it. Oh, from this one you know person it's like oh, I forgot your gift, oh, I have it. Oh, I'm going to give it to you next time I see you.

Speaker 1:

That was, that was a very big pet peeve of hers, like how you went on the tangent with the like reminders. That was her, that was hers on the birth. She's like, if you can't, she's like you have a month to give me my birthday present, she's like, and if you don't give it to me by then, she's like. It's like, it's like why, why even bother? So I thought it was yeah, I thought it was funny and I was wondering what your thoughts were. Um, is there a timeline? Um, I mean no, but I sort of agree, right, because we like to celebrate our birthdays and give it. I think giving a gift close to the date is good.

Speaker 1:

But my follow-up question to you is birthday gifts in general, right, like, unless you're doing a group dinner, right, which the birthday gift could be just paying for the dinner, ps, right, if you're going to a fun dinner and drinks. But what about, just like at our age, like, do you give friends birthday gifts if you're not doing, like, some sort of group dinner? Um, just certain friends, okay, just certain friends, yeah, if, if we're not going to do, I don't know if it's my friends, no, I'm just going to say no, you're going to, okay, you're. If somebody's close to me, then I'm going to want to treat them no matter what, right. So, and typically I'll bring like a little something. If we're just, like you know, kind of like friends, surface friends, I'll take you out to lunch. Yeah, you know, if I can, if I can't, I will not get a gift. I guess there's like stipulations. But somebody close to me, like my best friend Elena, she lives in New York, right, like my best friend Elena, she lives in New York. I can't take her out to lunch or dinner for her birthday, but of course I always get her gift. Yeah, you know. Yeah, so I like that.

Speaker 1:

Okay, I'm just curious, like opinions about birthday gifts or just gifts in general. Yeah, well, it's so funny. Okay, that wasn't, that wasn't mine, I swear no, I do think there's a reasonable amount of time to get somebody a gift, especially if you live close to them. Yes, I would. I would have to agree with her, but it is not a pet peeve of mine. It's not a pet peeve of mine. I think anyone, anytime anyone, gives me a gift, it's like I'm very appreciative of it. So I think that's okay. Um, well, this was so much fun.

Speaker 1:

I feel like we could go. We could have like a part two of like maybe pet peeves about our husband or our kids, cause we tried to really focus on us, but maybe that's going to have any pet peeves of my husband, I don't know. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that could go down a rabbit hole, that could go down a major rabbit hole. But, yeah, yeah, that could go down a rabbit hole, that could go down a major rabbit hole. But but, um, we thank everyone of our friends for telling us your pet peeves, because we got a big, big chuckle out of them and message us, like Nicole is saying, with your pet peeves, with your annoy-a-thon, if you don't name names, if you don't name names, there's like a zero judgment, zero judgment.

Speaker 1:

So, nicole, what time is it? It's my favorite time, it is unsolicited advice time. So what is your unsolicited advice today, nicole? Oh, geez, don't be annoying, don't be annoying, don't be annoying, don't be annoying. No, I think I really do think it's important to know, like the people that you're close with, I think it's important to know their pet peeves. Oh, really, I do. Yeah, that's so funny. Like I know one of.

Speaker 1:

I know one of Jerry's pet peeves and drives him crazy is when people text message and it's like one sentence lines. He's like just write me a paragraph, you don't have to like like hit, send after every period, oh, yes, like every. Every sentence is like send, send, send. I agree with him on that, although sometimes I do do that. I'm a very short texter, I'm not a big paragraph texter. Yeah, I'm not either. I don't, I don't want to. If I want to leave a long message, it's usually like voice text, right, but then I don't. I don't ever check my grammar or anything, but yeah, so I try not to do that to him. But like like uh, some of my friends are that's how they text, cause I don't know, it's like how you speak. Sometimes it's like conversation, yeah, and I'm like. He's like, could you please turn your sound off? So, like I know, if my one friend's texting, I'll just turn the sound off. You know, just, I, just I do.

Speaker 1:

I think it's important to know somebody's pet peeves. Oh, my gosh, you just made me think of. Another annoyance is when you're at a girl's dinner and someone has. They have their phone on there. My mom does this. I'll use this as an example. Like she has a sound for everything on her phone, nicole. Like she gets a text message, it's not even a ping, it's like a song. Right, she gets a call, it's a song, everything has a sound.

Speaker 1:

But when you're at a girl's dinner and someone has their text on, it's like I don't know why. It just like totally irks me. And maybe if you're what, if it's for a babysitter, but, but I would rather have someone put their phone out and look at it, right, or just check it every once in a while, because or maybe you have them on a different ring. I know people that have, like their emergency contacts on a ring, so it'll go through, right. I mean, usually, hopefully, a babysitter is going to call you if there's an emergency, not like text you or your husband but, um, but. Or if you're okay, say you're not at a dinner, okay, I'm just using this in general You're on a girl's trip and it's like it just pings all the time.

Speaker 1:

This in general you're on a girl's trip and it's like it just pings all the time. I guess my phone is always on silent. So, like I, I think for me I don't know what it is? Is it the sound? It's just like we get a million text messages. So why? I want to be with you, right, I want to be with this person and, like you know, I just think it's like it just keeps on ringing and ringing, and ringing and it's just, I just feel like you lose focus, right, okay, yeah, yeah, okay, okay, was I like that when you came here? No, I don't remember your phone ringing. It was the most.

Speaker 1:

The most recent thing was my mom, and I'm literally like mom and she's like, well, I can't hear it or see it, or you know. So, um, I'll just use her as the example, but I think that my advice would be to have a fun dinner with your friends and talk about all these things, because I actually, if you named like some of my best friends, I actually don't know what annoys them. So now, maybe I annoy them, I don't know. Um, I'm going to ask no, I'm, you know, I'm just I'm. Now, I'm like curious, everyone's pet peeves Cause, when my friends were sending me the million texts about this, I was like, yeah, I feel you like so hard on some of these things and I don't, I think it feels better, like, I feel like this was like good therapy for us, like I feel like great, I have no annoyances.

Speaker 1:

Now All of that has been lifted, yeah, and it's nice to know. It's nice to know that, like people have some of these crazy pet peeves, right, um, it's okay to have them. Well, they're not. They're not crazy to them, but like somebody was like my, one of my least favorite phrases are must be nice. She's like I am so sick of hearing must be nice that I just started answering with yes, it is just like okay.

Speaker 1:

Okay, we're going to need a part two. Nicole, save some of these for the next time. Maybe we'll get a guest on here too. Maybe we'll make it a modern mom date. Oh, yes, this is so good, so good. I think I know who I would ask, okay, okay, have an awesome day, ladies, talk to you soon. Bye, and that's a wrap for today's episode of Don't Call Me Midlife. We hope you had as much fun as we did. Absolutely, your support means the world to us. If you're just waiting in the carpool line, don't forget to follow the show, and if you're feeling extra spicy today, leave us a rating and review Before we part ways. We've got a special invitation for you. Join our newsletter to stay in the loop with all things midlife magic, bonus content and more. Head on over to the show notes for how to sign up. We can't wait to keep the conversation going. And, of course, remember, in the whirlwind of life and motherhood, don't forget to fill up your own cup first. You're extraordinary and your journey is worth every moment. Until next time, cheers.